King of the Hill

It’s an end of an era. Tonight was the Series Finale of King of the Hill, officially taking the last Beavis and Butthead character off the air. RIP The Great Cornholio.

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This is what I have to deal with

Me: Did “C” eat the chicken strips last night?

J: I had one for lunch.

Me: <sigh>

Now, she did offer usable information, just not usable in the conversation I had started.

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Instant Classic

This one comes from MRT.

http://www.peopleofwalmart.com

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Quote of the Day

If you don’t read the newspaper you’re uninformed. If you do read the newspaper, you’re misinformed.

                                                           -Mark Twain

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Big Brother 11

Has anyone noticed that Chima Simone from Big Brother 11 looks like the Bride of Wildenstein?

chima_simonebride_of_wildenstein2

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Lumensions’ PatchLink Update Server

If you use Lumension’s PatchLink Update Server, here’s a very handy SQL script that will output the names of your servers or workstations (devices) and count the number of patches they are behind. There isn’t a a way to do this in the app and it saves you from having to buy ERS.

USE PLUS
select b.agentname, count(c.impact) as xct, b.contactAddress, b.ContactDNS
from dbo.rpt_VulnerabilityResults a,
dbo.UP_Agents b,
dbo.rpt_Vulnerabilities c
--where a.agentid = '09B4BD74-3479-4727-AAFD-4C679B175D6C'
--and
where a.agentid = b.agentid
and a.vulnerabilityid = c.vulnerabilityid
and c.impact in ('Critical - 05', 'Critical - 01', 'Critical', 'Recommended')
and result = 'Not Patched'
group by b.ContactAddress, b.ContactDns, b.agentname
order by xct desc

Output below; It doesn’t spit out header info, I’ve added that manually below.

Device | Patches Behind | IP Address | FQDN

\\<server1> 119 1.1.1.1 server1.company.com
\\<server2> 79 2.2.2.2 server2.company.com
\\<server3> 76 3.3.3.3 server3.company.com
\\<server4> 76 4.4.4.4 server4.company.com
\\<server5> 65 5.5.5.5 server5.company.com

Now to apply some patches… 😉

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Friday Funnies – except there’s only one.

Hilarious link from hyphenw.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iK2OakMoW_c

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Motorcycle Burnout

Got this third-hand from a guy who went to Sturgis last week:

A guy does a burnout on a Sportster – keeps going ‘round in circles about 50 times until his tire blows.

Then he keeps doing the burnout on a blown tire until it saws ALL THE WAY through the street and into the dirt/gravel below the asphalt!

Chinks of burning rubber, asphalt, and gravel were spraying all over the crowd.

He finally stopped after he cut through the street and into the gravel below.

Best burnout EVER, no burnout can measure up after that:

Best Burnout Ever

Best Burnout Ever

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Today’s links

Passion swings both ways:

 http://www.buzzup.com/video/comedy/girlfriend-doesnt-realize-boyfriend-is-on-vacation/

Definition of multi-tasking:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pUdXhhDDnaY&eurl=http%3A%2F%2Fvideogames.yahoo.com%2Fevents%2Fplugged-in%2Fyou-are-not-worthy-kid-aces-guitar-hero-while-solving-two-rubik-s-cubes%2F1341619&feature=player_embedded

The Worst Beers in the World:

http://www.ratebeer.com/Ratings/TheWorstBeers.asp

 

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Sort iPhone Apps Alphabetically

This is something I’d been looking for infrequently and I’m not sure when it was added, but here’s a simple procedure for doing it.

From the Home screen:

Tap Settings

Tap General

Tap Reset

Tap Reset Home Screen Layout, and confirm your selection.

This will reset the first screen of built-in apps back to their default locations and sorts all the apps you’ve added alphabetically. Enjoy!

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